Look At My Shoes: Where Am I From?

Its a weird fun fact that when you travel, if you check out a tourist from the mid calf down, you can usually guess where he or she is from. So I decided to create this handy dandy quiz to test your shoe IQ. How many can you get right? Warning: theres two in there with two right answers! Heh.

 

Downing Some Serious Moonshine with the legendary “Shebeen Queens”

Shebeens, illegal South African neighborhood bars that originated under apartheid, continue to operate to this day under their female proprietors, known as “shebeen queens.”

Y’all know i can drink – I have drunk Vietnamese government officials under the table and even downed tortured turtle blood/gall bladder liquor. I’ve even dedicated myself to perfecting the art of drinking so much I searched the world and found the ultimate hangover cure. So when I heard about the Shebeens of South Africa I was like “I can handle it.” Then I heard they sometimes make their brew with battery acid, I backed off a bit… until I was assured that was “not done anymore” (wink).

Perhaps one of the most annoying yet smaller quality-of-life crimes of the apartheid era (especially for those of us who like a cold one on a hot day) was that nonwhites weren’t allowed to make or sell beer. The enterprising residents of Soweto did it anyway, brewing their own and hiding it under beds or in the ground when the police popped in every so often for a raid.

Click here for more on Pinky and her Shebeen… and the goat head I had to eat to cure my hangover (not nearly as amazing as the Vietnamese alka seltzer. Trust).

Scanning for Great White Sharks with South Africa’s Shark Spotting Network

In this episode of A Broad Abroad, I meet the Cape Town Shark Spotters Network, a group that watches the waters off Cape Town’s beaches to warn bathers about an abundant and deadly predator: the great white shark…

Monwabisi “Monwa” Sikweyiya has spent almost every day for the past eight years on the cliffs overlooking Muizenberg Beach, just outside of Cape Town in South Africa. The former surfer and his co-workers take five-hour shifts at a time looking for one thing: great white sharks.

For years, even before the movie “Jaws,” the giant predators have fascinated (and terrified) people, and for shark enthusiasts and researchers, this beach is one of the places to go cage diving and fishing for great white sharks.

“There are lots of seals and penguins here, and that is their diet,” Sikweyiya said. “So they come to these beaches to feed.”

Related: Drinking the Strongest Brew in South Africa With a Shebeen Queen

But the area is also perfect for surfing. And the two simply do not mix, at least not if you want to keep all of your limbs.

To learn more click here.

The Dubious Dawa Man of Carnivore

The dubious Dawa (medicine) man of Carnivore restaurant – the ultimate tourist trap in Johannesburg which is like the Epcot Center of South Africa (providing you and all its guests with a real, live South African experience!) … promises his drink will soothe all your pans and ills and make you happy. Which it may. If you aren’t AA or an angry drunk.

Where: Carnivore Restaurant, Johannesburg

Why go: You’ve seen animals like zebra, elan, springbok and crocodiles from a Jeep, now why not experience them on your plate? Just like a real African! Carnivore, which prides itself on giving tourists the ultimate realness in African experiences, is the meat eaters ultimate Epcot center. Adding to the Epcot-ness is, at least three times a night, the servers and other staff with beat drums and sing and dance across the dining area (which, in keeping with the theme, has zebra patterned nylon seats).

Take Note: Crocodile oddly takes like fish. We’re talking fishy fish. And Zebra? Stick some slices on rye, with a little bit of horseradish mayo and that would make a mighty fine sandwich.

Fun fact: There’s a “Dawa Man” – dawa is the word for medicine, and the “medicine” on offer is a sickly sweet vodka, honey, lime and sugar drink. “It’s the medicine for everything,” our Dawa dude told us. “It makes everyone happy!” Unless, of course you are one of those people who are angry drunks. Or an alcoholic.

Don’t Forget: Your Tums. And perhaps a Cliff bar.

A Cuddle With Baby Cheetahs? HELL YES!

I’m a huge fan of getting up close and personal with the locals… especially if those locals just happen to be 2 feet long, furry, and endangered. So, when I heard I had the chance to cuddle with a group of baby cheetahs, my first thought was: “Oh hell yes! We must do this immediately.”

Related: On the Frontlines of the Rhino “Genocide”: Saving a Species on the Brink

The Cheetah Outreach center on the edge of Cape Town, South Africa, is “an education and community-based program created to raise awareness of the plight of the cheetah and to campaign for its survival,” according to its website. Their motto is “See it. Sense it. Save it,” and for a mere $12, you can go and pet baby cheetahs. For the same amount, you can get your picture taken with an adult cheetah (hence, the rise of Tinder cheetah pics in South Africa). Sadly, I arrived too late for the adults — but not the babies! 

For more info click here.

The Best (Human) Guides to South Africa. Call Them Now.

I am a firm believer in having real, live guides — especially when you’re traveling to a country you have never visited before. Humans enhance your trip more than a book or website ever could. They will tell you stories and help you brainstorm activities that you never dreamed were possible. They’ll show you the insider spots that you would never know to look for without a local.

With that in mind, here are my favorite guides in South Africa — a vast and varied country with wildlife, culture, booze and so much more.

1. Theo Pieters

Your Ultimate (Human) Guides to South Africa

A former police officer, and now a veritable “fixer” and director with White Rivers Exploration, Theo was invaluable to me during my South Africa trip. Acting not only as a bodyguard (which I needed in downtown Johannesburg), he was my driver, guide, and, eventually, friend. It is because of Theo that I learned about the Adrenaline Driving School, where I learned how to do a J turn and how to flee from from hijackers (should the occasion arise) in the Ultimate Driving Course.

He’s also responsible for introducing me to Vincent Barkas of Protrack Anti Poaching, the wonders of biltong and wors and … almost everything else.

Related: On the Frontlines of the Rhino “Genocide”: Saving a Species on the Brink

Though he’s based in Johannesburg, Theo travels all over the country, so you can ask him to meet you anywhere. He will also tell you fun stories about the times he did security for Celine Dion and John Legend.

Email: Theo.pieters@whiterivers.co.za

2. Dimi Roro

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Want to know the real ins and outs of Soweto and Johannesburg? Dimi is your lady. Thanks to her, I got to see the shebeen queen of Soweto, the Muthi healer, and Faraday Market. She’s fun as heck and she knows everybody. As a journalist, she also knows how to get almost anything done.

Email: Dimiroro007@gmail.com

3. David Forrestimage

A historian, David, who works with the South African Tourism Board, is a must if you are interested in South Africa’s past. He knows almost everything about anything historical and is delightful company. Based in Johannesburg, David can travel all over the country and is happy to meet you wherever you go and suggest itineraries.

Email: davidforrest@telkomsa.net

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On the Frontlines of the Rhino “Genocide”: Saving A Species on the Brink

When most travelers head to Africa for a safari vacation they are hoping to spot the “Big Five.” That is shorthand for the big game— lion, elephant, buffalo, leopard and rhino. But, if things don’t change and soon, they will only ever get a chance to see the “Big Four.”

To date, there are only 26,000 rhinos left in Africa — 80 percent of which are in South Africa, mostly in Kruger National Park. Last year, 1,004 rhinos were killed in South Africa. So far this year, the number has climbed to 618, with the toll in Kruger at 400.

Since 1992, Vincent Barkas has been on the front lines of what he calls the “Rhino Genocide” in South Africa. His small unit of just over 100 men patrol the area just south of Kruger in Hoedspruit, South Africa, searching for rhino poachers.

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